Thursday, May 24, 2018

Dear Mr. Trump

Dear Mr. Trump,

You cancelled the summit because somebody in North Korea said that Mike Pence is stupid?  If that's really the case, you do realize that you're going to have to cancel the whole world, right?

Lame excuse.  I don't know if anyone has mentioned this to you yet, but you're giving the unfortunate impression that you're just too chicken shit to have a meeting with Kim Jong Un.

I have an idea:  Call Keith Schiller and have him come over and punch you in the nose.  Just so you know what it feels like.  When you recover (and I promise you will) I think you might be less likely to worry about what people think about Mike Pence.  You might find Vladimir Putin less enthralling.  And maybe you'll feel less of a need for a big, beautiful wall to keep you safe and warm.

Who knows?  You might even stop looking for spies under your bed.

It's worth a shot,


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