Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Friday, January 18, 2019

Individual 1

Dear Individual 1,

I dunno.  If I were Michael Cohen's father-in-law, I would be thinking that you're threatening a witness.  Right out in the open.  On TV, and in writing.

And if I were Robert Mueller, I'd be thinking the same thing.

Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying this.

Keep that genius stable,

Underemployed


Thursday, January 17, 2019

Sophomoric

Dear Lindsey Graham,

sophomoric:
adjective
"pretentious or juvenile"

Sort of like your little stunt during the Kavanaugh confirmation hearing, no?

Judge not, lest ye...etc.,

Underemployed


Let Me Finish

Dear ex-Governor Christie,

I was checking out the news yesterday, wondering what new species of slime Robert Mueller had lately uncovered in his beau geste, and - lo! and behold! 

There you were.

On the SAME DAY that NumbNuts Giuliani dropped the hint that there MIGHT have been some "collusion" with foreign governments conducted by the Trump campaign (but not Trump, never Trump, oh no),  I was treated by excerpts from your new book (for lack of a better word), depicting the wailing and gnashing of teeth over your "friend Donald" (the never-colluding Mr. Trump) being used and led astray by a nefarious gaggle of - what were your subtle sobriquets? - 

"...amateurs, weaklings, grifters, convicted and unconvicted felons..." in the White House.

Shocking.  What's an illegitimately-elected pseudo-President to do?

If only you were there to help him realize his glorious vision of a newly-great America.  One that would give new meaning to the phrase - let me finish - "Soviet Union".

Am I reading that right?

Antipathically yours,

Underemployed




Sunday, November 25, 2018

A Farewell to Arms

Hear any good jokes lately?

Me neither.

Unless you want to count Nikki Haley's farewell lovefest, where she promised to campaign for "this guy" and waxed poetic about Jared Kushner's "hidden genius" (good Lord, I hope we've seen the last of her, but I'm not optimistic).  And possibly Trump's call for decorum was funny, or would be funny if it weren't so freakishly bizarre coming from the calumnious mouth of President Surly.

Actually, it was pretty funny.  So maybe it's me.  

It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to find the silver linings of humor amongst the clouds in Trump's brain.  Likewise for the bottom-feeders who encourage him.  His supporters are funny only when you turn off the sound and look at what they're wearing.  And the only thing funny about Jeff Sessions (besides his ears) was Kate McKinnon.

I have Trump Fatigue.  With any luck, it's contagious.

So I'm winding this down.  I don't want to degenerate into just another sour, angry voice.  And I have confidence in our newly elected Democrats in Congress.  This is NOT to say, however, that I won't be back if Kellyanne Conway's husband runs off with Sarah Sanders.  Or, better yet, Mike Pence.

I'll leave you with two things.

First, I have the perfect solution to Russian influence in our elections.  Get off of Facebook.  And Twitter.  And whatnot.  Now.  No excuses.  Easy, right?  And remember, the Internet is for one thing:  shopping.

And secondly, this shocker from a biography of the Trump family which my husband gave me to read for research purposes (and which, thank God, I no longer need):

Eric is the smart one.



Tuesday, November 6, 2018

Dear Mr. Trump

Dear Mr. Trump,

It warms the cockles of my heart to hear you label something you heard on "Fox & Friends" as Fake News.  And it's about time.

Could this be the start of something beautiful?  Like Republicans turning on themselves in an orgy of mass self-cannibalism?  One can only hope.

Wishfully thinking,

Underemployed