Dear Children,
I'm sorry that we took you away from your mothers and fathers. And I'm sorry that another day will come and go and nobody will do anything about it.
But here's the good news: Everybody (except for, maybe, Jeff Sessions and Steve Miller) HATES what's happening to you! Mr. Trump hates it, and Paul Ryan hates it, and even Kellyanne Conway (who should never wear green, ever) managed to come up with a shred of maternal-like feeling.
Mrs. Trump hates it so much that she sent her very own spokesperson to tell everyone how much she hates it. (Ivanka doesn't seem to care one way or the other, but she's busy with her plans to sell tampons in China, so don't take it personally). And lots of Senators and Members of the House of Representatives are all really concerned.
However, the need to separate you from your parents seems to be a law of physics. Nobody, not even The Most Powerful Man in the World Who Has Accomplished More than Anyone in History (to hear him tell it, which we do, every single day, ad nauseam) is apparently able to put an end to this sorry state of affairs.
Now, if it were me, I would probably pick up the phone, ask to speak to the person in charge of things at the border, and say, "Stop it."
And I doubt I would get an argument.
There's hope. We will just have to put up with all this grandstanding until Mr. Trump gets his $25,000,000,000 in extortion money, or the 2018 election rolls around in November. Whichever comes first.
Until then, little ones, be brave. You've already shown that you're braver than anyone in Congress.
Regretfully yours,
Underemployed
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