Dear Susan Collins

Dear Senator Collins,

Nice try, but methinks that you and Senator Flake have been - how shall I say this...?

Hornswaggled.

As have we all.

Dispiritedly yours,

Underemployed

Dear Blake Farenthold

Dear (soon to be ex-)Representative Farenthold,

Thank you for being yesterday's comic relief.  Actually, if I lived in your district you would be every day's comic relief (hello, duckie pajamas!  see previous post All Hat, No Cattle), although the taxpayers from whom you took $84,000 might not find you so funny.

$84,000!  That must have been a humdinger.  Why do Texans persist in thinking they're all cowboys?

At any rate, I'm sure Susan Collins will sleep better tonight knowing she will never face another challenge to a duel. 

God willing and the crick don't rise.

Happy trails,

Underemployed

Dear Susan Collins

Dear Senator Collins,

Thank you.  I will sleep well tonight.  Though I would sleep even better if somebody would shut down President Pumpkinhead's Twitter account.  (Time for some aggressive action, General Kelly, don't you think?)

I would also like you to know that you are my hero and my role model and I want to be you when I grow up.  

And if you run for president, I will send you money.

Your fan,

Underemployed