Monday, July 16, 2018

Helsinki

Dear Mr. Trump,

Personally, I think you looked - and sounded - straight-up, flat-out terrified.

Of what?  One might wonder.

Curiously yours,

Underemployed



Sunday, July 15, 2018

Dear Michael Avenatti

Dear Michael Avenatti,

"...every time I watch him work, I think, 'This is what it must have been like to see the Sistine Chapel being painted.'" 

- Stormy Daniels

I couldn't have said it better myself.

And I love how she brings the Holy Father into play here.  Seriously, you guys are keeping me off the Galliano.

In bocca al lupo,

Connie Staccato
President
Italian-Americans Against that Boombots in the White House


Friday, July 13, 2018

Dear Paul Ryan

Dear Congressman Ryan,

No, your car was not "eaten by animals."

Your car was eaten by me, my friend Jan, and thousands of angry, rabid Wisconsin voters.  With our bare teeth.  And we're still hungry.

My advice:  Don't buy a Lamborghini.

You've been warned,

Underemployed


Tuesday, July 10, 2018

The Big Reveal

Three things more interesting than Donald Trump's Big Reveal on Monday night:
  1. The Thai children trapped in the cave.
  2. The immigrant children trapped in the United States.
  3. George Clooney's pelvis.
I admit that I wondered - briefly - if Trump would use his "Mussolini" face or his "I'm a big boy now!" face for the occasion.  Mercifully, the curiosity was not overwhelming enough to inspire me to turn on the television.

So I guess I'll never know.


Saturday, July 7, 2018

It's Perfectly Simple

  1. Google Donald Trump.
  2. Google Robert Mueller.
  3. Read their biographies.
Enough said.


Dear State Senator Steve Firtzgerald

Dear State Senator Fitzgerald,

"Outside of Western civilization, there is only barbarism."

You can say this?  With that beard???

Woof,

Underemployed